Introduction
Adopted children often experience heightened stress responses due to early life experiences. Helping families understand how the brain works during moments of stress can empower both parents and children to manage big emotions more effectively.
Dr Dan Siegel’s “Hand Model of the Brain” is a simple, visual tool that social workers can use in their direct work with adoptive families.
Here is a video of Dr Siegel demonstrating the Hand Model of the Brain
Explaining the Hand Model
- Wrist: Represents the spinal cord.
- Palm: The inner brainstem, responsible for basic body functions.
- Thumb: The amygdala, which processes strong emotions like anger, fear, or stress.
- Thumb in Palm: Together with the palm, forms the limbic system (the “downstairs brain”).
- Fingers: The cerebral cortex (the “thinking brain”).
- Fingertips: The prefrontal cortex, responsible for reasoning and self-control.
When the fingers are curled over the thumb, the “upstairs brain” (thinking) and “downstairs brain” (feeling) are connected.
Why use this model?
- Normalises emotional responses: Explains to families that “flipping your lid” (lifting the fingers away from the thumb) is a normal response to overwhelming feelings - especially for children with a history of trauma.
- Promotes emotional literacy: Helps children and parents visualise what’s happening in the brain during moments of dysregulation, making it easier to talk about and manage emotions.
- Supports regulation: Encourages families to notice when they or their child have “flipped their lid” and to use strategies to reconnect the thinking and feeling parts of the brain.
How social workers can use the model
- Demonstrate the model: Use your own hand to show families how the brain “flips its lid” during stress and how it reconnects when calm.
- Encourage reflection: Ask parents and children to notice when they feel themselves “flipping their lid” and what helps them return to a regulated state.
- Promote coping strategies: Work with families to identify and practise calming techniques (deep breathing, taking a break, sensory activities) that help reconnect the “upstairs” and “downstairs” brain.
- Empower parents: Remind parents that their own regulation is key - modelling calm responses helps children learn to regulate themselves.
Summary:
The hand model of the brain is a practical, accessible tool for helping adoptive families understand and manage emotional responses. By using this model, social workers can support families to build emotional awareness, resilience, and stronger relationships.