Promoting play and joy in adoptive families

Promoting play and joy in adoptive families

Play is a powerful tool for building connection, resilience, and emotional wellbeing in adoptive families. As a social worker, you can support parents and carers to understand the value of play and help them integrate joyful, playful moments into daily life, even during challenging times.

1. The Importance of Play

• Connection and attachment: Encourage families to set aside at least 10 minutes each day for dedicated play. This special time can deepen the parent-child bond and reinforce the importance of fun and connection.
• Types of play: Highlight the many forms play can take - social, imaginative, object-based, ritual, and more. Each type offers unique opportunities to strengthen relationships.
• Learning and social skills: Explain that play teaches children how to socialise, cooperate, and understand boundaries. Rough-and-tumble play, for example, helps children learn about limits and self-control.
• Emotional regulation: Emphasise that play allows children to safely explore feelings and scenarios, supporting emotional growth and empathy.
• Attunement: Discuss the concept of “serve and return” - reciprocal interactions that build attunement and synchronise parent and child. These moments are vital for brain development and connection, and they remain important as children grow older.
• Imagination and creativity: Remind families that imaginative play fosters creativity, problem-solving, and the ability to make sense of the world.

2. Building play into daily life

• Routine: Suggest families set a regular time for play each day (e.g., not too close to bedtime to avoid overstimulation).
• Special time: Encourage parents to call it “special time” and make it one-to-one, which can also help with sibling rivalry.
• Child-led: Advise parents to let the child choose the activity, offering two options if needed.
• Full presence: Stress the importance of undivided attention—phones off, distractions minimised.
• Adapting for teenagers: Support parents in joining their teenager’s world of play, whether that’s talking about video games, doing makeovers, or making videos together. The goal is to share in their interests and joy, not necessarily to participate in the activity itself.

3. Practical ideas for play

Share these suggestions with families to inspire their dedicated play time:

• Blow raspberries or wrestle (with clear boundaries)
• Rough-and-tumble play, with agreed limits
• Role-playing and make-believe
• Playing with figures, toys, or puppets - using voices and stories
• Building dens or castles
• Singing or dancing together
• Using props like balls, balloons, puppets, feathers, or colouring books
• Pamper sessions
• Playing games like Uno or dominoes

4. Key principles for parents and carers

• Give your full presence - turn off your phone and focus on your child.
• Avoid competition - play is about connection, not winning.
• Be patient - children may reject play at first; persistence is key.
• Focus on free play - avoid using this time for homework, screens, or bedtime routines.
• Encourage problem-solving, turn-taking, and creativity.
• Avoid criticism - support your child’s independence and confidence.

Remember, play is for adults too! Encourage parents to find their own moments of joy and fun.

Summary

By promoting regular, joyful play, social workers can help adoptive families build stronger connections, support emotional regulation, and foster creativity and resilience. Your role in modelling, encouraging, and reinforcing these practices is vital